Today I am 30.
There have been wonderful moments today. Early this morning I walked through the snow, down the streets of Cambridge, to get to Harvard Square. I went to a spa and got my hair dyed, a facial, and my eyebrows and bikini waxed. I’ve had several facials before, but I’ve never had my hair professionally dyed before or had anything waxed. It was nice, although I have to say that my favorite part of the entire experience was the walk to the Square through the snow, listening to music on my iPod and enjoying the solitude and movement.
Also my two best friends, who are both very far out of the country, planned a scavenger hunt for me. I guess they’ve been planning it for about two months, and they did a very good job. When I woke up this morning there was a small present and a postcard that sent me to work. When I got to work there was a small present and a postcard sending me to my local Starbucks. When I got there, a small present and a note sending me to a coffee shop/bakery. When I got there, a birthday cake and one last note telling me to go home. And when I got home, one final lovely present and a beautiful card telling me how much they both loved me. It was wonderful and considerate and made me miss the two of them so much it hurt. I spent a long time this afternoon driving from place to place crying because I am so incredibly lucky to have such good friends.
There were also bad parts, but the truth is that those parts are much less important in the grand scheme of the day. All in all it was a pretty damn nice birthday, even with my heightened and fragile emotional state.
But here’s the most important thing to come out of this day … I am at peace with my age. In some ways I have taken a very different path in life than is normal for a person my age. I have no education, no career, and really no idea what I want to do with my life. But I am married to a man who I love and who loves me very much. Sometimes our relationship is less than perfect (which may be putting it mildly). But there is hope for the future and we are constantly making forward progress. And I have a son, a beautiful, brilliant, amazing 2 year-old son. He is, so far, the greatest adventure of my life, and I’m pretty sure that he’ll remain that way for as long as I’m around. If I can raise this child well, if I can make him be the person he has the potential to be, then my life will have been well lived.
I am 30. I am no longer a child. As a great man said just recently it’s time to put aside childish things. So as cheesy as it sounds I am going to treat today as exactly what it is … the first day of the rest of my life.