I haven’t written lately because there’s nothing to report.  No good news, no bad news, nothing.  We’re trying, which means that we’re hanging out and talking and fighting and having sex and trying to remember what it feels like to be in a relationship with each other.  I’m definitely having problems jumping back into the relationship, but I really am trying.  It’s just that when I decided it was over I began planning a life for myself, a life on my own, without J.  All my ideas and hopes for the future changed from including him to being only for myself and Darwin, and I really liked that.  I liked the idea of really building a relationship … not with him but with myself.  I haven’t been single for longer than a couple months since I was 14, so I’ve esentially spent my whole life working on relationships with other people, and not on the relationship I have with myself.

So yeah.  That’s what I’ve got going on.  Nothing.  Nada.  Zero.  Zilch.  Blah.


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